Friday, September 30, 2011

Where Did You See God Today?

Hello Everyone -

My newest blog stems from one simple, yet complex question.

Where did you see God today?

There are no right or wrong answers.  Just your thoughts.  In your world, what did you see today that reminded you of God, His attributes, His love, His ways, etc?

This morning I saw God as I watched my cat, Prince Charming.  Yes, that is his name.  Admit it, you love it!  Anyway, Prince had his nose pressed up against the glass doors in our living room when I went downstairs.  He was watching two chipmunks as they played on our back porch. 

At first he was just content watching them play, but then he tried to get at the chipmunks.  I'm not sure if he too wanted to play or if he just wanted to eat them.  Either way, he was stopped short in his tracks by the glass door, which sent him sprawling backward.  He got up, shook his head for a while, gave me a dirty look (like I had something to do with it) and headed off to his room.

That is when I began to chuckle...loudly...out loud.  I couldn't help myself.  I don't know if it was because my cat thought he could walk through glass, because of the sound he made when he hit the door or because I had just been given a dirty look...by a cat!!!

My laughter reminded me of God and His joy.  It felt so good just to sit in it for a moment.  "For you make me glad by your deeds, Lord; I sing for joy at what your hands have done."  Psalm 92:4 (NIV)

See how easy it is to share where you saw God today?  What I'm asking you to do is click on the link below and simply share your story.  Please check back often and be blessed by the daily appearances of God in our world.

Love,
Bonnie

http://www.surveyonics.com/surveyflow/Where-Did-You-See-God-Today/9929

Married People Sure Need Prayer

A few weeks ago I asked married people to answer some questions about their marriages.  Their answers will explain the title of this blog.

The people who answered were split evenly by gender, half female and half male.  They met each other in such places as school, youth group, work, through friends and family. 

Of our group, the largest percent of them, over 50%, had been dating for one to three years before they got engaged.  Only one daredevil got engaged after less than six months of dating.

They split up pretty evenly in length of marriage, with two notable exceptions.  Only 10% of them have been married for 1-5 years.  The other 90% are split between 6-10 years, 11-25 years and 25-50 years.  However, none of them has been married for over 50 years.  Not yet anyway.

Their proposals vary from in the car parked at the families driveway, after a trip to New York City, flat out saying, "I want to marry you", nothing special, at home, an Indian restaurant and Wal-Mart.  Seriously?  Wal-Mart?

My two favorite proposals were the lady who listened several times as her suitor asked her to marry him in words and in poems and then finally asked him!  And the guy, who met his wife at a McDonald's, but proposed to her on the beach, with roses, champagne and his grandmother's ring.  Now that's a guy who is going places!

What is the best thing about their marriage?  Shared passions, children, laughter, unconditional love, trust, commitment, doing things together, being taken care of and having a best friend.  One guy says his favorite thing is having a super hot person with whom he can snuggle.

What could they do better in their marriages?  Pray, forgive, give marriage to God, be more gentle, more romantic, more understanding, more of a servant, help with finances, argue less, trust the future, pay more attention and better sex (this from a guy who uses sex as the answer to several questions).

What do they want their spouse to do better?  Listen, be more patient, more affectionate, stand up for them, place them first, don't give them grief, serve them more, be more considerate, keep growing in God and communicate more.

Lastly, I asked the what the marriage of their dreams would look like.  Half the group said, "I have the marriage of my dreams."  This was also the group who said they could change and wanted their partner to change.  One quarter of the group said, "I have the dream marriage, but..."  The honest group (ahem) cited things like less money woes, they would be more united, less disagreements, financial stability and more shared activities.  Oh yeah...and our favorite guy who wants more sex and more money.  I'm beginning to feel bad for his wife.

My dear married people, thank you for your honesty and for your humor.  As a single person, I have learned a lot from you.  Mostly what not to do!  My prayer for each of you is that you  take steps every day to strengthen your marriage and always keep Christ at the center.

Love,
Bonnie

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

We are NOT all terrorists!

Today's blog centers around a 47 year old female, who works in healthcare.  Our survey taker lists the country she belongs to as the United States, but she gives us some insight into her culture.

The first thing on our friend's mind is people who incorrectly believe, "we are all terrorists."  You can almost hear the hurt in her voice as she says the words. One truth about her culture is they eat with their hands a lot, using bread as their utensil. 

Every one of her answers points to her dream of "no hungry kids".  If she could change the world, she would make sure every child had three square meals a day and candy on Saturday.  I have always loved Saturday!  She gets angry when kids in America go hungry, because in her words, "there is no excuse."

Her greatest joy comes in helping the poor by supplying food for them.  Guess why she wishes for more money.  You got it!  To buy food to feed the poor.  What kind of future does she see for her children?  They will carry on where she left off with the hungry...of course.

Our friend defines success as "going to bed every night exhaused from doing the right thing."  I've got some work to do in that arena.  I go to bed almost every night exhausted, but it's because I am serving myself, not others.

I would like to hear some comments from you.  Tell me how the war on terrorism has affected you and what you are doing to feel secure in an insecure world.

Also, there are several surveys on my website, including a new one for married couples.  Please visit my website at www.bonnietilley.com and take one or more of the life changing surveys.  The married couple survey is giving me incredible insight, which I will share with you soon.

Love,
Bonnie

Monday, September 19, 2011

Best Definition of Success EVER!

As promised, today we venture into the heart and mind of a 12 year old middle school student.  I believe you will be surprised by what we find there.  For instance, the first thing our student wants you to know is, not all American children are spoiled brats. 

Her dream is to be a nurse and heal the broken.  She wants to change the world by helping the homeless and spreading the Word of God around the world.  She doesn't sound like a brat to me, how about you?

The one thing that makes our student angry is fake friends.  Yes, that certainly sounds like middle school, doesn't it?.  She gets the most joy out of helping people.  This is a child who, every time she gets a free moment from school, can be found at a local assisted living facility, helping the elderly residents.  At 12 years old, she is already working toward her dream. 

My favorite thing about our friend is that she gives the best definition of success EVER!  She simply says success is defined as, "doing well."  As the old saying goes, "out of the mouths of babes..."

Precious student, I wish you blessings as you continue toward your dream of becoming a nurse.  You already have the compassion, it comes through in your responses.  I would tell you just one more thing.  You are already successful.  Not only are you doing well, you are doing very well.

If you have not taken my life changing questions survey, please go to www.bonnietilley.com and take one or more of the surveys available.  Please check back on Wednesday when we will be discussing why some cultures remind people of terrorism.


Love,
Bonnie

Friday, September 16, 2011

I Would Like An Order of Personality Please

Okay, as promised, let's have a chat with our college student.  He is 18 years old, Black/African American and serves as a mentor.

He says the common misconception about his culture (and age group) is that pleasure and personal gratification are the only things they are concerned about.  Instead, he says the youth of today are striving to find their identity and become leaders in the world.

His dream is to be a teacher, get married (he qualifies this with a maybe), have some kids and become a better youth leader.  He wants his children to live in a world where it's okay to be smart and they are promised a great education.

If he could change the world, he would get rid of MTV, VH1, E! and BET.  Once that is finished, he is off to South America, South Africa and even the United States to revitalize cities and countries with relation to government, education and social class. 

Our friend finds success in doing what God considers excellent.  He gets angry when he fails at something or when he fails someone else.  He finds joy in being able to help someone on this journey called life.  He loves to sow into other people.

He gives a similar answer to the what would you want more of and what would you change about your life questions.  His answer...personality.  He finds it hard to speak with people, especially women (that might explain his maybe).  His desire is to become smooth and suave so he can leave his social awkwardness behind.

My dear college student, it is cool to be smart.  Without people like you, we wouldn't have doctors and lawyers and great engineers.  In your answers we find a loving, honest, caring person.  Now that's personality!

Please visit my website at www.bonnietilley.com and fill out any of the surveys listed there.  Many people visit the surveys, but few take the time and energy to fill them out.  I am asking you to make the effort.  It will be worth it for you, for me and one day for the world.

Tune in on Monday, when a 12 year old gives us insight into her world.

Love,
Bonnie

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

The Professor Weighs In

If I finish this blog in the next 30 minutes, I will have kept my promise to give you a Wednesday entry.  So let's get started.  Today we will be talking about the Black/African American culture.  I list the culture this way, because that's how it was described on the surveys.

My subject is a 49 year old female with a Master's Degree.  Her current occupation is listed as College Professor.  So,  let's get "schooled", shall we?

The first thing the Professor wants us to know is that Black/African American people are diverse.  They aren't just athletes, but business people as well.  They love music from classical to rap.  They wear anything from baggy, drooping pants to high fashion.

They also fight against many stereotypes.  Not every Black/African American person is "Ghetto Fabulous" (her words), thuggish, rapper-like, ignorant, uneducated, poor, looking for handouts, lazy, shiftless or a criminal.

The Professor's dream is a world where everyone respects everyone else, even though they may be different or hard to love.  If she could change the world, she would make it so everyone works in a field they are passionate about, doing what they were created to do.  If she could change something in her own life, she would want to have a closer walk with God, to hear His voice more clearly.

Lies, deception, cheating and lack of integrity make her angry.  All these items were written in capital letters, so they must make her VERY angry.  She finds joy in God, family, friends and giving to or helping people.

Our friend wishes she had more time so she could accomplish everything on her plate.  More money so she could do more for her family and for others.  More love because she struggles with forgiveness at times and more tolerance because she pulls away from ignorant, lying and deceiving people instead of showing them love and compassion.

I hope you are challenged by what is written here, I know I am.  Professor, wherever you are, thank you for causing me to think and take a long, hard look at what I believe.

Since my first few entries have been about women, Friday we will take a look at the world through the eyes of a 19 year old male college student. 

There are now three surveys on my website.  If you have not taken them, please go to www.bonnietilley.com and take one or more of the surveys.  We want to hear what you have to say.  Thank you!

Love,
Bonnie

Monday, September 12, 2011

My Jamaican friend and the word, "Mon"

Hello Readers -

Today we are off to the island of Jamaica to learn about a woman in her 40's who answered my survey very honestly.

Her first thought, and I would imagine the one most pressing on her heart, is the misconception that everyone in Jamaica ends their sentences with the word "mon".  According to my friend, this simply isn't true.

What other misconceptions do people have about the Jamaican culture?  That everyone there knows how to jerk chicken, is an avid fan of Bob Marley, does not have a college degree (the person answering this survey has a Bachelor's degree AND owns a business), lived in extreme poverty prior to coming to the United States and is aggressive and confrontational.

What is the truth about our Jamaican friends?  Their parents instilled national pride in them at an early age, they are self-reliant, independent, hardworking, family oriented, respectful (especially of the elderly) and have a strong moral fiber.

My friend's dream is to live financially independent, in a country of her choice and to be engaged in ministry.  People in authority, who abuse their power, make her angry, as does inequality.  She finds joy in family, friends, good meals and great conversation.

She sees a future for her children where they are changing the world with confidence and boldness.  They are standing on God's Word being sure of what they believe and why.  Sounds like a great future to me!

Thank you, my Jamaican friend, for sharing.  If you have not filled out the Life Changing Questions survey, please click on the link below and share your story.  You never know, my next blog could be about you!

Please visit my blog again on Wednesday when some of my Black/African-American friends give you a wonderful look into their culture.  Thank you!

Much Love,
Bonnie

http://www.surveyonics.com/surveyflow/10-Life-Changing-Questions-For-People/9717

Thursday, September 8, 2011

Do all Africans live in huts?

Today is the day I share what I have learned as people begin to answer the 10 Life Changing Questions.  Today's post is also the only time I will use a person's name and yes, I have their permission.

Tadala is a 19 year old sophomore at Boston College and someone I love dearly.  If you know Tadala, you know she is often wise beyond her years.  Her answers to the questions are no different.

Tadala's family is from Malawi.  She feels the greatest misconception about her culture is that they are based either in poverty or on conquest.  She goes on to say that the perception is, "the people in Malawi live in huts and need the rest of the world to take over and organize their lives."

What Tadala wants you to know about her culture is that it is based on the richness of family and friends and on love and adoration for each other.  If you spend any time with Tadala or her family, you quickly learn this is true.

Tadala's dream is to provide free medical attention (regularly) to people who are unable to afford it.  Close-minded people make her angry and she wants more Christian friends at school.  Why?  Because she sometimes feels alone.

Thank you Tadala, for your beautiful words, your honesty and insight into your culture.

If you have not answered these Life Changing Questions, please click on the link below and share your heart with us.  Also, please check back here often for more answers.

Much Love,
Bonnie

http://www.surveyonics.com/surveyflow/10-Life-Changing-Questions-For-People/9717

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Why Life Changing Questions?

Hello Reader -

Once you check out my website at www.bonnietilley.com,  you may be asking yourself, "Why Life Changing Questions?"  The premise is actually very simple.  I believe that our world today is fragmented.  We are all so very disconnected from each other.  By asking diverse groups, Life Changing Questions, my prayer is that we will discover just how many things we have in common. 

When we find common strands in our lives, we will want to know each other even more and that will open up dialogue.  Dialogue that may change how we view each other and how we view our world.

So please, join me on the journey.  Click on the link below and take time the time to answer the questions as honestly as possible.

http://www.surveyonics.com/surveyflow/10-Life-Changing-Questions-For-People/9717

You, my friend, could have the answers that change the world around us.  Thank you for your support and participation!

Love,
Bonnie